Remember how last year I got to got to the Miss America Pageant? Well I got to do it again, and boy was it just as good as the last. We may not have gotten to see a ventriloquist, but we did get to see the most amazing jump roper, ever. She literally sat on the ground and jumped the rope with her butt. Miss Hawaii...you are insane. (in a good way. a very good way).
Here's some other things I learned:
-In Louisiana, if you bite someone with your natural teeth it's considered simple assault. If you bite with false teeth it's considered aggravated assault.
-Poor Miss Wyoming sang Adele, directly after another girl danced to the original. No one is going to sound good if you follow Adele. Nobody. But she was pretty awful anyways.
-The host Dena Blizzard is now officially a Kardashian. I jealously watched her get sworn into the family.
-Pennsylvania has the largest llama farm in the world.
- Miss Missouri singing Aerosmith was amazing.
-All the other girl's dancing was pretty pathetic. And that's an understatement.
-Mark Ballas is so talented. He totally swooned me with his guitar playing and singing. So sexy.
The end.
Oh and I got to see Kris Jenner in real life. That was fun.
Oh and I forgot to mention...I know Miss Nevada.
We hung out a few times.
Here's proof.
She's pretty freaking awesome. No lie.
Dear Miss America Pageant,
You are all too entertaining.
...Until next year.
xoxo,
Ashley
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